The Laura Mobile

Quick trip turned mini-vacay

2009-09-20T20:07:00.003-05:00

Kyle and I set out on our journey to San Antonio on Friday afternoon (about 5 hours later than planned) in Mitch (an 8 and a half hour car trip turned into a 15 hour adventure...). It was my intention to stay until Saturday morning and make the trip back solo, stopping off in Shreveport to spend some time with my parents.

But seeing as how we got in so late, it made sense to just stay an extra day, get some sleep, and leave early Sunday. Then came Jazz Alive, a weekend festival in the park downtown. It was fantastic fun with lots of tastiness at the various food booths and great Latin music (yeah, I was confused too seeing as how it was Jazz Alive, but fun nonetheless...). This was followed by The Lion and Rose Pub at which Kyle's theatre buds from SA wanted to get together to see him. FANTASTIC bread pudding, beautifully authentic decor, and a lovely little story in the back of the menu. But you know theatre people...and when there's a show going, no one gets bail til the clock is in the a.m. So we stayed pretty late, and upon pondering the situation it seemed best to sleep in and drive home on Monday. It was a tough decision, having to weigh band practice with some good peaceful sleep and the sound of the waterfall flowing into the pond in the back yard, but I'm safest on the road when I'm not tired. So today was another sleep til 3 day with a big family dinner, and some quality couch time.

Couch time I'm enjoying now, comfy and cozy, in San Antonio, and I'm planning to get to bed at a decent hour, but I make no promises. After all, I did remember to pack Zombies in my overnight bag...

Days 5 with the new dental buddies...

2009-02-02T15:58:00.002-06:00

...and going strong. Eating is still an interesting experience, and while smoothies are much easier on the teeth, all that fruit is not so easy on the stomach. I'm looking at it as an excuse to eat a LOT more Hawaiian sweet bread than necessary :p But I've noticed today that the only part of my mouth that's all that sore is the inside of my right cheek where it keeps getting caught when I smile big or laugh and try to talk at the same time. (A hard habit to break, I'm finding) My teeth have stopped "itching" for the moment which is nice. I'm sure it'll come back as my wires change and when they introduce the rubber bands, but for now it seems my challenges are limited to learning how to eat and brushing more gently. I managed to grind my teeth in my sleep so hard that a bumper popped off at about 5 this morning, so I'll be investing in a mouthguard after work today to wear when I sleep. I figure popping that in is a heck of a lot easier than taking the time to wax every bracket at night so we're killing two birds with one stone. wooT.

Hugs!

Braceface!

2009-01-29T15:50:00.002-06:00

Yep, that's me! As of about 10:15 this morning, I was sent on my merry way out into the world with a mouth full of metal. God willing, in 18 months, my center teeth will be all lined up, my bite will be all lined up, and I won't have that little gap on the left side of my mouth for my tongue to poke through in pictures. wooT! In the meantime it's really not all that bad. Other than having no desire to talk (I'm serious. Laura Michelle actually has no desire to speak. Write it down, I doubt it'll last long), no clear idea of how to chew, and a list of food no-no's in my wallet, life is basically the same. When we started getting costumes for "Cell Block", I didn't picture myself ever saying this, but I can only hope that when Saturday night comes, the audience will be too busy looking at what I'm not wearing to notice me spitting on them during my mini-logue. :p

A thank you note

2009-01-22T15:20:00.004-06:00

I've been listening to Relient K today. They're a fantastic Christian rock group. I love their lyrics. When I was younger I had this vision of printing the lyrics to my favorite songs and wallpapering my room with them. It's still tempting, and at least one whole wall would be Relient K. It doesn't matter what mood I'm in or how my day is going, they're always a good choice. I can jam to them, I can cry to them, I can sing along, I can dance-all good things! So I'm jamming to an album I hadn't listened to until today in my office, and I'm deciding it just might be my favorite yet, and it kind of creeped into my head, "Thanks, Kyle."

It's been almost a year since Kyle packed his things and made way for Texas, leaving me happily in the arms of a better man. Most of the time the only things I say about him or the former us are fairly deprecating, and most of the time, I'm being pretty honest. For a long time afterward I couldn't figure out why I'd been so stupid. I was pretty upset with myself, but somewhere in the last few months I got to a point where I started to see things that were obviously part of God's reason for letting me stay "stupid" about the situation for so long. Things I learned, things I found...I wouldn't have had Cadence. I wouldn't have Puck. I wouldn't have half of my favorite albums on my iPod-including Relient K. I wouldn't have had Guenevere or Mitch. I wouldn't appreciate the closeness of family as much as I do because I wouldn't have been estranged from them for so long. I might have had a much happier final conversation with my brother, but then who grows from fluff-right? I wouldn't have my job at Strauss. I wouldn't have Mikey. And none of those things is in any way insignificant to who I am or how I live. They're all very important pieces of my life, and I got them by being stupid.

Now, I don't plan on purposely going out and being stupid and expecting good things to come of it, but it did make me think about other things that I regret or am disappointed in myself for. I'm afraid of failure, always have been-that Type A obsession with success. I think it really helps to see regret for what it is: silly and a waste of time you could be spending happy with something else. If I'm not going to waste time regretting a failure, it's a lot easier to not be afraid of it. Because it's that disappointment that I'm really afraid of-the lingering regret over something lost with no consideration for what's gained. Every time I get angry, I learn something about myself. In retrospect, I have a lot of people to thank that I spent a lot of time being upset with.

I have a hundred and some odd channels now...

2009-01-09T21:40:00.004-06:00

...and what's on repeat in my head? Serendipity. The scene where Jonathan is reading his own eulogy that his best friend wrote in lieu of a best man speech. All about being an ass and throwing out all reason to follow your heart and find your destiny.

Does it really work that way? I mean, can you be the kind of person who does that and ever find another person who does? Doesn't that whole "opposites attract" stuff get in the way? So if you're running around throwing out reason to follow your heart and find that your destiny is someone who won't even throw out an old sock for love...how can that possibly be right? There's a movie whose name I can't think of for the life of me right now that talks about how every relationship has a giver and a taker. And while most Hollywooded philosophy is a load of hopelessly romantic crap, that bit really does seem to be true. We wonder why divorce rates are so high in America. Because Americans accept the fact that a giver must settle for a taker just long enough to fall deeply in love and get married only to realize just what a shit deal the giver got. They resent the other person for being what they are and resent themselves for being so stupid. And they turn themselves into the taker by giving up the marriage and taking back their lives and learning how to be a little selfish. The taker resents the giver for resenting the taker when the giver "knew what they were getting into"...when really, neither party took the time to get to know what they were getting into.

My generation is labeled for hasty, stupid decisions. My generation is labeled correctly. This is why our parents and grandparents dated for years and years before getting engaged. This is why our parents and grandparents had long engagements. It wasn't to give them time to back out. It wasn't even to give them time to get to know one another. They've got a lifetime to do that. It's because at some point, the giver has to become a little bit of a taker and the taker has to become a little bit of a giver. And THEN you have a relationship. THEN you have a marriage. THEN you have a life together. You can't milk a calf...I don't think. You can try, may even have fun doing so for a while, but you're going to fail and move on to a full grown cow that's more satisfying in the milk department. Unless you're really stupid and you manage to move on to a bull. All grown up. Still no milk.

It's not really anyone's fault. You can't blame either party. If you're always given everything, how do you ever learn to do anything other than take? And if you're never given anything, how do you know when it's okay to take? You've got to teach each other, help each other, listen to one another, throw some reason out to make room for one another. Sometimes, you've just gotta be an ass.

Theme Song

2008-10-01T09:25:00.004-05:00

I'm currently enrolled in English 102 at ULM. We have several essays to write over the course of the semester. The essay at hand is an analysis of theme relating to a movie. My essay will discuss the theme of American Beauty.

My blog will not. My blog is going to catalog the thoughts that have been fizzing around upstairs for a few days concerning theme. But not movie theme. Life theme.

Lives are stories, just as any book or movie or play. In turn, most forms of entertainment are simply portrayals of life, whether there's really much of a plot or not, whether there's a moral or not, whether the characters are very well defined and developed or not, whether they burst out in random song and dance...or not, and they all have themes. Some undoubtedly much more sophisticated than others, but themes nonetheless. And while there are a great many differences between life and a movie, the biggest one is that your conflicts can't be solved and summed up in an hour and a half to three hours. Every scene is meant to accomplish something.

Our lives are millions of trillions of scenes, each meant to accomplish something and further the understanding of the theme. So how do you get 22 years in and still not know what you're furthering towards? It's as if we live more of a CSI episode, and the true beginning of the story isn't revealed until the end at which point the in-between makes lots of sense. Until that final scene with the great (and amazingly cheesy) closing line, you know your efforts to understand completely will be fruitless.

At least a four dozen times throughout my little life, I've stated with great conviction to some loyal friend, "This is like a theme song for my life!" But if Newsies' "Santa Fe" is the anthem for my life, I'm in trouble. (I'm currently comfortable with a Bayside meets Relient K theme. God help me if that's the end all be all of theme songs!) I think we all have a set of "scene songs" that we pull out to commiserate with or reminisce with of a time when it was a veritable outline of our own experience. But if I had to pick one, ONE to sum up my entire life-what would that be?

Forget the movie. What's MY theme? What's MY plot? Where's MY character development? I couldn't write that paper if my life depended on it. It depends on my life. And that depends on the paper Someone else already wrote for me. Vicious cycle.

A Whole New World in a whole new light

2008-08-15T11:03:00.005-05:00

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t9-CS2v8wcc&feature=related

Do yourself a favor and click. I'm not savvy enough to embed the clip, but you've gotta watch it.

Bleeding Love is pretty fantastic as well...and Part of your World...

Mr. McGregor

2008-08-11T10:05:00.003-05:00

Just a few pics of "Greg" at 4 wks. He's a chubby little boy. But very healthy! When he's not eating grass anyway.... :) Enjoy!

Been a while...

2008-08-09T13:25:00.003-05:00

...and that's not because nothing exciting is going on!

The parents came in the weekend after I closed on the house and were a God send to help me clean up the new place before the movers came that Sunday! Since then, movers have come and gone, and my car has made about a thousand trips to K Street to get all the "little stuff" lugged over. But it's all in the new place now! And it's all actually made its way (in box form at least) the it's respective permanent room. I've rearranged my ideas on how I'm going to lay out certian things in the house, and I'm very pleased with the current situation.

My sister and nephew came into Bossier just over a week ago, and I've been very lucky this trip! Today makes the SECOND time I've seen them during their visit. That just doesn't happen. And I love it. Luke's gotten so darn big since I got to spend time with him last! He's spitting out words all over the place and tip toe running like a little motor butt! It's great :) And "Aun' Lala" is very very happy.

Tuesday marked the beginning of an adventure: there's an addition to my little family. Yes, dears, Laura Michelle now has 4 dogs. One, a 4 week old Border Collie named Mr. McGregor (We call him Greg. It's all Mikey's fault really :P The name that is, not the puppy itself). I'll post pictures on Monday. I've been dying to post since Wednesday, but I wanted to surprise the fam this weekend and my wonderful big sister keeps up with my blog (I love her all the more for that-but it does make surprises more difficult). So! Monday it shall be.

Greg and I are spending the day in Bossier City with the whole fam. Well...the "whole" fam. In fact, that's why we're here. We're having my brother's ashes blessed at mass tonight. I think it will be very nice. A peaceful affair. He'd approve.

And little man should be waking up right about now,m so it's poo and eat time! huGz

Moving Too Fast

2008-07-24T09:40:00.004-05:00

Did I just hear an alarm start ringing?

Did I see sirens go flying past?

Though I don't know what tomorrow's bringing

I've got a singular impression

Things are moving too fast

I'm gliding smooth as a figure skater

I'm riding hot as a rocket blast

I just expected it ten years later

I've got a singular impression

Things are moving too fast

And you say, "Oh, no, step on the brakes

Do whatever it takes

But stop this train

Slow, slow! The light's turing red"

But I say: No! No! Whatever I do

I barrel on through

And I don't complain

No matter what I try I'm flying full speed ahead

I'm never worried to walk the wire

I won't do anything just "half-assed"

But with the stakes getting somewhat higher

I've got a singular impression

Things are moving too fast

I found a [boy that] I love

And I found a [boss] who loves me

Things might get bumpy but

Some people analyze every detail

Some people stall when they can't see the trail

Some people freeze out of fear that they'll fail

But I keep rollin' on

Some people can't get success with their art

Some people never feel love in their heart

Some people can't tell the two things apart

But I keep rollin' on

Oh, oh - maybe I can't follow through

But oh, oh - what else am I supposed to do?

[---]

And I think well, well, what else is in store?

Got all this and more before twenty-four

It's hard not to be sure

I'm spinning out of control

I'm feeling panicked and rushed and hurried

I'm feeling outmaneuvered and outclassed

But I'm so happy I can't get worried

About this singular impression

I've got a singular impression things are moving too fast

-Jason Robert Brown

"Moving Too Fast"

The Last Five Years

So...you can see how I relate to JRB. :) You can hear it here: http://www.myspace.com/elmichelleprofilemusic

Love y'all!

A homeowner am I.

2008-07-23T16:29:00.003-05:00

Yes, ladies and gents. As of 10 a.m. yesterday, I own a home. Well, right now I own a house. By Sunday evening when all my stuff is there, I'll own a home. :) Locks were changed this morning. Carpets will be cleaned Friday. Movers coming Sunday. Parents coming today. Brother's birthday Saturday. Cousin coming Sunday. Workshops starting Monday. It's an eventful little week...to say the least of the month!

I broke down a bit on Monday night. "I'm 22 and I'm buying a house and I'll be stuck in Monroe FOREVER!!!" Waaaa.....I'm better now. :) I think the keys in my hand fixed that. Well, and the Mikey. I know how badly I try a person's patience, and I swear the boy's got nerves of steel somedays...no pun intended.

So there's no furniture in the new place, but by goodness there's a brand new rubber ducky shower curtian! wooT! And a fresh toilet seat....and an army of sugar ants which I valiantly pine-soled. And a princess key in my very, very near future!!!!!

I want to write but I'm rather scattered. I have a feeling that's not going to subside too soon, but it's not really troublesome. It simply means blogs will be a bit haphazard when they're there. I know you'll survive. :)

Grand happy thoughts all around!

Ruminations: A Hodge-Podge of a Blog

2008-07-20T16:06:00.002-05:00

I've been absorbed by music lately. Lots of downloading going on. And my office is never without iTunes playing. I finally burned The Last 5 Years in its entirety, and it won't leave me. Jason Robert Brown has this way of narrating your life. That's not to say that the show in any way resembles my life. It doesn't. But lines and verses here and there, I swear, come straight out of my subconscious (more eloquently and melodic than they are in there, mind you), and I think that's why I get so trapped by these songs. Because I can't express myself like that and if I can sing it to myself at the top of my lungs-well that does it more justice somehow.

I love those days when some little seemingly insignificant facet of your life simply makes sense suddenly, and to you it seems so powerfully affective and...overwhelmingly profound. Just to you. With no sense to make. There's not even a definition of that facet. No way of explaining or decribing what it was that now makes sense. There's just a wholeness in that little cubby now. Today was one of those days.

I'm buying a house on Tuesday. Yes, 9:30 Tuesday morning. And today, I'm sitting in my office on a Sunday, having completed the cash entries from the YT dinner theatre and check requests for the week, and looking up professional theatre auditions. This is not the face of a bright person, I'm thinking.

But I'm having a good non-spiked hair day. Boyish or not. Those are always nice.

The kitchen is much more packed than it was yesterday. Two whole boxes more full. Speaking of which: if anyone has access to empty boxes-especially the paper ream cases with the lids instead of flaps-please let me know. They're very helpful, but kind of scarce. Thanks!

And that's about enough of a decoupage blog.

Terry took me sailing.

2008-07-18T08:57:00.003-05:00

A little history: Most of you know that my older brother Terry passed away in a motorcycle accident last December. Some of you know what our last conversation entailed. And probably two of you have I ever sat down and talked with about it. I don't do well with change when I'm not the one enacting it. I missed one day of school performances of the Christmas production at YT to be with my family, and I was back at work the day after his open house. Focus keeps me sane. And while I've dealt several times over the past few months with this feeling of being disrespectfully detached, I haven't been able to change that my way of dealing with things is to throw myself into something concrete-most often, work.

For the first month or so, there were nightmares. Watching Terry die in 12 or 15 different ways consecutively like a stunt show with an unhappy ending every time. Then came the cameo dreams. Pass him on a street in a dream where he is otherwise irrelevant. Watch him wave to you from the back seat of a taxi as it pulls away from the curb. Not bad dreams. A little startling some nights, but mostly just indifferent. And then came the unreasonable freak out of "my brother's haunting my house...no, someone other than my brother is haunting my house." I do know how pathetic that is, but that fear, unreasonable or not, eats at you pretty hard. I haven't slept in a house by myself in at least three weeks. And I sleep heavily, but not well. I roll, I kick, I talk...

But last night, I slept in my house all alone. I was asleep about 15 minutes after I walked through the door. The pups never barked, never leapt from my bed to investigate haints at the back door. And when I woke up, one single strip of my spikes had been flattened-right up the center of the back of my head. No rolling. No fussing. No tangled in blankets from twisting and situating. I slept all night. Terry took me sailing. It was perfect. I have not been so well rested in months. (On 4 hours of sleep no less-I have no words for The Dark Knight. I only have smiles.)

On a completely different topic: my curiosity cannot contain itself. In response to a recent conversation I was party to, how many of you lace fingers when holding hands with a significant other? Please include your age in your response.

Hugs y'all!

OH! Closing on Tuesday. End of story. I'm even getting the lawn mower back. YAY!

Closing Time

2008-07-17T11:19:00.003-05:00

Yes, my dears. I'm closing on my house. 11:30 tomorrow morning, provided that all "corrections" have been made by the time Ledatha and I do our (hopefully) final walk-through this afternoon, I will sign away my little life, and go get keys made in all kinds of fun shapes and colors. :) I think I don't mind being a grown up.

So wish me luck or say a prayer that all goes well. That I get a check for a new refrigerator and lawn mower. That the cieling fan is a cieling fan. That the bathroom fan is not so very fraily hanging. That the filing cabinet and all its glory is GONE. And that 11:30 tomorrow does not become 11:30 Monday morning. I'm ready. You ready? I'm ready.

Hugs!

Can I just say...

2008-07-14T15:20:00.003-05:00

I HATE STUPID PEOPLE!

Closing has been pushed back. July 21. At soonest. Why? Because my realtor, oh so bright as she is, incorrectly worded the last contract agreement, and FHA won't accept it. So we have to re-write, re-sign, and re-submit. Yay.

THEN when I go to sign she tells me the owners aren't moving the filing cabinet out of my dining room. Now, first, may I explain that this thing is a monster. I wouldn't exactly be excited about being responsible for removal of the thing. It's giant and green and old and has concrete in the bottom. It might as well be an army safe. BUT I didn't sign for a house with a giant filing cabinet in my dining room. And I WILL NOT buy a house with a giant filing cabinet in the dining room. "Well if they take it out there may be wall damage." Fine. They can fix it. End of story.

Case of the Missing Refrigerator: It's been replaced. With a used one. And yes, it's a nice fridge. Newer than the other. But with no ice maker. I bought a house with an ice maker. It was their STUPID mistake of selling the thing. They can buy me a refrigerator that is at least comparable with the one they sold like greedy idiots.

Oh-all excited about my lawn mower and weedeater? They sold it. The lawn mower. It's gone. "Well, they can roll the reimbursement into your closing." NO. I paid for that up front with a check that they have already cashed. They can write me a check of their own. Yes, it's only $25. But damnit, I DON'T CARE. Don't be STUPID and you won't have to give me back money I gave you.

The kitchen fan, as per the inspection, was unstable. The agreement was they stabilize or replace. So they replaced....with a light. No fan. A light. I didn't buy a house with a light in the kitchen. I bought a house with a fan in the kitchen. And a fan there will be. Or I will not buy a house.

All because they're greedy, lazy people. I cannot IMAGINE. I just don't understand. I mean, I'm paying FULL PRICE for the house, ALL of the closing costs. I paid for ALL of the inspections AND the appraisal. And you're going to sell the fridge that was part of the deal AND my lawn mower that I already paid for AND decide that a fan is just too expensive to replace? WTF!

So: I MIGHT be closing on the 21st. And I MIGHT not be closing at all. Yay for STUPID PEOPLE!

Bad news...

2008-07-14T08:59:00.004-05:00

I regret to inform you all that Mikey has taken gravely ill, and I will be filling in for him as Peter Pepper in this weekend's performances.

:P Kidding. GREAT NEWS: I officially close Thursday, July 17. wooT! So...if anyone is available this weekend...right now I'm planning on renting a UHaul for Saturday and getting the majority of my junk over there before the show. If anyone is available and willing, I'd be grateful for help! (I'm dangerous in large vehicles)

In other news-Dr. P is going very well though we did have smaller crowds last weekend. I'm thoroughly enjoying myself-that's for sure! And we'd love to see y'all there!

And that's about all for today! Hugs and SunShine!

The Death of Dr. Pepper

2008-07-12T13:51:00.004-05:00

Remaining performances:

July 12, 17, 18, 19, 24, 25, 26
at 7:00

at the Cork Room

Chicken OR Fish: $35
Steak: $40
Krystle, Priscilla, and Laura Michelle sexed up: Priceless

See you there!

It's 10:30 a.m.....

2008-07-10T10:45:00.002-05:00

...and not only have I already been on TV, (COME SEE THE DEATH OF DR. PEPPER) eaten donuts, peed in a cup, and started work, but I've also already finished my first (and supposed to be only) coke for the day. (COME SEE THE DEATH OF DR. PEPPER) Yikes. That's dangerous stuff.

So I just got the appraisal back...drum roll please...

$95,000!

wooT! We're in the clear! (COME SEE THE DEATH OF DR. PEPPER)All that's missing is one little bank statement and I will have a house! Maybe by Tuesday! The refrigerator has not been "found" per se, (COME SEE THE DEATH OF DR. PEPPER) but we do know what happened now. Just a slight misunderstanding of the contract by the sellers, but I'm getting a new fridge, so wooT!

More ticket sales for Dr. P (COME SEE THE DEATH OF DR. PEPPER) so we should have a decent crowd if not a full one tonight. I'm pumped! You should be too! (COME SEE THE DEATH OF DR. PEPPER)

Not much else going on. House: check. Dinner theatre: check. Yep-that's life.

EDIT: COME SEE BLATHER, BLARNEY, AND BALDERDASH AT YOUNG TROUPE TOO!

A week's worth of house updates and other tales.

2008-07-07T14:57:00.003-05:00

I've written this once already, and of course, it was fantastic. But my computer didn't like me this morning, and I don't have the patience or the energy to make it all that fun again so in a nutshell....

Got a call on Monday of last week saying that my loan had been denied and I needed a co-signer. And I'm thinking, if I'm suppose to get this house, I will. If I don't get it, I'm not suppose to. A couple hours later (proud of myself for not stressing-you can ask Mikey. Cool as a cucumber was I.), I got a call from my parents saying they'd run into a high school classmate of my sister's who is now-get this-a mortgage broker. (Okay, God I get the hint.) So called him on Tuesday and gave him rough numbers to which he said there was no reason I shouldn't be approved. Drove into Shreveport Wednesday, was approved in about 5 minutes, signed my little life away, the appraisal was ordered, and life was good. I was told my insurance quote was rather high for the norm and given other options. Several companies later, I was only in higher prices and decided to stay with USAA. Now, Mom made it over this Saturday to see the house (which she liked! wooT!), and upon entering we discovered the fridge was missing, probably sold at the estate sale. Well that little detail is part of the contract-if it doesn't come back, I can walk away and not buy the house, they can replace said fridge, or the price of the house will be lowered to compensate. Which is not all bad. I mean, either I pay less at close and go fridge shopping (I've already gone pricing. Fridges are way more fun these days than they use to be!) or I get a brand new fridge that they've picked. Either way, better off than with the old one, so no harm done. During our little visit, my realtor gave me one last suggestion on insurance. And with a little call this morning, I had a beautiful BEAUTIFUL quote-several hundred dollars cheaper than USAA. The appraiser went out today and will have the paperwork back to the bank no later than Wednesday, and although we thought that with the finance trouble we'd have to push closing back to the 25th, I may in fact have keys in my hand next Tuesday! wooT!

In other news-I got to make the annual trek to Jefferson, TX for their Independence Day Celebration in Otstott Park! You have to understand that although not really spectacular in any way, this is one of my favorite events all year-albeit outside in the middle of the scorching southern summer. I think it's pretty much on par with Christmas. Jefferson itself is itty bitty and made up of a gridwork of streets that are basically a bunch of classier more well-kept Trenton Streets with an old time general store and the most fantastic family run Italian restaurant you could find. In Otstott Park (which is in total about the size of main stage...just the stage), there's a gazebo where all the big things take place and tents are set up all around it with hotdogs and homemade ice cream and kids events and whatnots. We usually arrive right about the time the choir is performing which is followed by the outlandish cake auction (two cakes sold for $1000 and they made over $6000 in total off of around 8-10 cakes! Just cakes. Sheet cakes, pineapple upside down cakes, etc. The proceeds go to the children's library-talk about community support!) and then comes the Shreveport Metropolitan Concert Band (that's really why we go-my mom's played oboe with them for something like 14 years and I played percussion for 7). Halfway through the concert comes....THE DUCK RACE! See, you can purchase a number for $5. And when the let the rubber ducks go, if the one with your number on it wins, you win. They usually do it in the river (and they use to only charge $1 a duck) but this year, the flooded the main street and #15 took home $500. No, #15 was not purchased by the Laura Mobile OR the Steele Mobile (who accompanied the fam this year! I LOVE sharing Jefferson, and it was a blast to be able to share it with my Mikey), but by a 6 month old little girl! Whoa. After the concert is their big fireworks show and then we dine and then we drive home. Like I said, nothing terribly fascinating, but it gets more and more special to me every year. I've noticed lots of little bits about home doing that. I miss more and more the longer I'm gone, and it becomes more fantastic every time I do get to see it or experience it again. All in all, a very happy 4th of July was had!

And those are all the tales I have for today. I'm sure I'll more on the mystery of the missing refrigerator tomorrow. Hugs!

Cut off your nose to spite your face...

2008-06-30T13:52:00.004-05:00

Before
After

Well I cut off my hair! And it wasn't of malicious intent. It needed to be started anew. Yes ladies and gents, every last millimieter of each strand remaining is completely and totally 100% MY HAIR with no color added or stripped away! :) And my head is much the happier for it!

In other news, I have a week off and I'm sitting in my office. Now granted, I'm not actually doing work, but that's because I've already answered emails and listened to answering machine messages. I am about to enter a check for production fees, and then I'm going home. No really. I promise. Yeah....right.

This wonderful week off gives me a fantastic opportunity to start the packing process. Mama Meg's donating boxes to the cause tonight (I LOVE YOU!) and I think the Hailey may escape the monotony that is summer by helping me toss things in said boxes. July 15th cannot come fast enough!

Speaking of which-I hit up the estate sale this weekend. It's amazing how much more open that place is without all the furniture and pictures and stuff! Crazy. But exciting. More exciting: Laura Michelle is now the proud first-time owner of a lawn mower and weed eater! And you have no idea just how proud she is. :p

Okay. Going home now. Yes. Honestly. Let the boredom begin!

Fifty yards further

2008-06-26T10:43:00.002-05:00

I've had a little more time on my hands lately (shocking, I know, but rather wonderful), and I've gotten to do things like clean and read and spend time with people-and my pups. Cadie and Gadget and I have been walking a little more. Now, besides burning calories for me and keeping the pups exercised and not bored, walking is a blissfully peaceful time to think. And considering the number of things in my head in the past few weeks, that time has been a great help.

I always kind of gravitate towards the levee when I go for walks. It's close and safe and open and breezy and sunny and it's a very distinct path. I don't have to think about where I'm going, I just go. The lack of necessary thought kind of induces introspection. There's nothing for the pups to really get into and very little to distract them, so the walk is nice and smooth. Now if you've ever followed that levee north far enough, you know there's a fence separating "the island" from the rest of the little world around it. Well I've noticed something about myself:

Every time the fence comes into sight, 50 or so yards off, my brain automatically contemplates turning around. I mean, clear end ahead-it's only few feet or so-right? Is it really worth it? It's not going to burn a significant number of calories. It's not going to consume a significant amount of time thereby prolonging the journey by much. But I always keep going. I walk until my toes practically touch that fence before I turn around to return home. I know part of it is because I'm stubborn like that. I'd be a little upset with myself if I "gave up" early. Pathetic, I know, but that's me. The other part of it is because I know how fast the little gears in my head spin, and I know that in those last few feet I could hit some kind of gold mine.

Tuesday night, I rather did. I realized I react in the same manner with a lot of aspects of my life. I can see a clear dead end in a project or a situation, and I keep pushing. Because I don't know what's going to happen in that last little stint. The next 2 minutes of an argument could win it. The next 3 pages of a report could open up a new vein of thought. I could learn something. I could teach something. I could create something. I could still succeed. Right could prevail!

But I can't ever seem to do it with people. (This could explain several facets of my life....) I see that fence as an inevitable roadblock, a very firm and final dead end sign, and I do a swift, irreversible about-face and march right home. No wasted effort, no wasted time, just quick and painless and done. I can't really say why. Part of it, I'm sure, has to do with the extra variables in dealing with humans. It's not something I can "manipulate" in the next 50 or 60 yards. It's something I'd have to walk WITH, and while that's not enough time to burn calories in, it's definitely enough time to get totally and completely unreasonably frustrated. Part of it, I think, has to do with proving myself. There are rare occasions concerning people when I will walk knee deep in mud to the fence to prove a point or just be obstinate. When there's nothing to prove, there's nothing to gain. Now, I do understand that's just not true. But that is how my mind works when it's left to its own devices.

I kept thinking that if I could just grab that extra half of my reasoning for continuing the walk when it came to friendships or relationships, I'd be so much happier. Consider what you could learn, Laura. About yourself. About someone else. About people. What could you understand? What could you create? Why couldn't you still succeed? If a project or report or argument could break the fence down or build a gate through it, why couldn't time with this person?

For the last few months I've been better about it actually without really realizing that there was a problem there or making a conscious effort to ammend it. Which I think only bodes well for the future. I mean-if I can accomplish something WITHOUT knowledge or effort, what mind blowing progress could be made WITH it! And all because I walked fifty yards further and touched my toes to that fence.

Ode to Workaholism

2008-06-25T10:30:00.000-05:00

I'm sitting at a desk completely covered with junk, and I cannot think of a single thing to DO. So much of the coming season is already DONE. Audition notices, patron flyers, reservation notices, posters....all designed. Dates all set. Which is great, but now I'm bored. All that's really left is to put on my hot pants and go round up some producers for Young Troupe's 08-09 productions.

Of course, after my shopping excursion last night, I don't have too much confidence in the hot pants. Supposedly I'm fat but I've got great boobs. Yay for cleavage-right? Ugh. I keep getting this very clear picture of Gidget on the beach with all her friends in bikinis showing off for the boys while she flops around in her full bathing suit, flippers, and goggles. "Really-letting eligible men see you in an outfit like that. Haven't you got any pride?" "Pride? Well I guess I'll have to look up the definition of the word again." Seriously-since when does sexy mean slutty? And when did a size 11 make a person fat?!

And when did God find it amusing to make "girls" into "girls". I'll never get it. It's not walking through a store with a size 4 next to you that makes you miserable. It's the size 4 with the attitude, the penchant for throwing money away for the sake of fashion, no tact, and a society that encourages it. Oh well. Lesson learned. Only shop with your own species. A "girl" I may be, but a "girl" I simply am not.

New Link to House pics...among other things...

2008-06-24T09:28:00.001-05:00

http://viewmorepics.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewPicture&friendID=80859186&albumId=2040462

Alrighty-that should do the trick!

In other news:

The inspection went pretty beautifully. There are about 10 small items (stove burner, clogged drain, lightbulbs here and there...) that are not only very simple and inexpensive to fix, but they're going to be taken care of by the sellers before closing. Actually...they'll probably be taken care of by the middle of next week. wooT!

Loan actually went to the underwriter today so cross your fingers and say a little prayer on that one.

If you're just super curious (I realize I'm probably the only one who's this excited about it), there's an estate sale this weekend. I don't have any idea what time, but I'm sure I'll get a call. Some part of me absolutely cannot wait to see what it looks like empty...or emptier at least.

Termite inspection and appraisal should happen sometime next week, and I'll be packing up a storm on my week off so if anyone has ideas for boxes, I'd love to hear them!

I think I'm tapped out on tidbits. I promise to be more interesting and introspective come July 15 :)

House pics!

2008-06-19T10:55:00.003-05:00

Below is the link to my myspace album of "the house". Inspection today! Wish me luck!

http://viewmorepics.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.editAlbumPhotos&albumID=2040462&MyToken=3ff8bef3-e33b-4d03-8eb7-cf78c9f6620d

Oh-and I need a new primary care if anyone has suggestions.

Interesting little tid bit...

2008-06-18T09:40:00.002-05:00

It occurred to me that Mikey's last name and my last name have something in common: they're both real things with an "e" added on the end. Hm. I just find that amusing on some small level.

I've a new endeavor. That little tid bit came to me as I was brainstorming that new endeavor. I've always enjoyed writing. I've got two or three plays and musicals started, but nothing finished. Partly because I don't have time to really write...and partly because I don't make the effort. But I've got a great deal of will power at the moment.

Those of you familiar with Strauss are well aware that STC has launched into new territory: dinner theatre. And some of you have seen that dinner theatre first hand. We're currently procuring scripts through Mysteries by Moushey. We're currently not completely and totally satisfied with their product, and we've been looking for alternatives. And i truly believe this is the best one yet: write our own. You pay no royalties. You have the option of publishing them and licensing them out to other troupes. This alternative not only saves us money, it could make us money. So the question is: who's going to write them.

I am. Well, I am with help. I talked with Mikey last night about teaming up and being STC's official dinner theatre playwrites. I'm going to broach the idea to Bob. And I could just be delving into a double homicide by lunch. :)

Here's the thing: I think we should be asking the audience what they want to see. Asking the actors what they want to perform. And I don't think there's going to be any objection to a little suggestion. So tell me. If you were going to pay 35 or 40 bucks for dinner and a show-what do you want to see? If you're going to stand in front of a hundred hungry people-what do you want to do?

This could be another one of those new beginnings that are becoming so popular these days.

Little by little.

2008-06-16T11:13:00.002-05:00

That is how I must write this blog because while I am antsy to talk, I'm also under the weight of audition forms that must be entered into the audition database. Bonus: It's the first batch of the new season. wooT! New beginnings are nice :)

And a plethora of new beginnings are around me.

New artistic director at YT taking more than just my kids: he's taking some stress. Yes, I miss that excitement of creating something fantastic and original and collaborative with Monroe's most talented wee ones. But I don't miss being buried underneath that new creation. I like this evenings off thing. It's plenty new and exciting on its own. Which makes for a new facet of Laura Michelle: de-stressed. Whoa! Who thought that might actually happen?

New furniture. I've had an empty living room for nearing on 9 full months now. But no more. Thanks to mom and dad, I have a new area of the house to relax in. Lovely. Thanks to my aunt, I'm going to have a real place to eat my meals at and something to put in the guest room which is going to come in handy for...

New house. My offer was accepted Saturday morning. I go to put in my formal loan application this afternoon. Now that I think I'll need some prayers on if anyone has a spare moment. I just don't have a whole lot of credit. What I have is fine, but not enough. So they're going to have to manually underwrite it, and that I feel is going to take something more than the cute little dimple He gave me. Next on the prayer list: the inspection. wooT!

New friends. Well, not so new friends becoming much closer. So really its more like new dynamics. It's strange to me to have people I really enjoy being around. Enjoy enough to miss when time won't allow for enjoying company. But I like it. I hope it becomes a very un-new feeling. :)

New classes. I am officially registered for Accounting 212 and English 102 (Math was full...poop) for the fall of 2008. And I'm absolutely giddy.

New character. I signed on for The Death of Dr. Pepper, Strauss's next dinner theatre endeavor. I am steamy southern belle Lily. Now that's a new one for me. But fun. Very fun. And while I've worked with Steve, Mikey, and Mark before, Priscilla, John, and Krystal are going to be fun to get to know. So there we also have new theatre pals. wooT!

New shower head. That one may be the smalelst new thing on the list, but it is amazing the difference it makes. Easier puppy baths. Easier to fill a mop bucket. Better morning shower. And when you start your day with that shower, it makes the day easier.

New days. Every single one is. Brand new. And waiting for me to turn it into a yesterday.

Friday the 13th? I laugh in the face of Friday the 13th!

2008-06-13T16:56:00.003-05:00

Mwahahahahahaha! Because it's got nothing on my day....

So I woke up this morning with a dog with hot spots (skin allergies that flare up in warm weather), an appointment at ULM, and a day's worth of poster and ad layouts that were due.

By 8:30 I was officially a Business Major at ULM set to register for Fall classes as soon as I know which sections I'd prefer...8 am three days a week versus one night a week for 3 hours...

By 1, my little Puck's butt was shaven and his hot spots on their way to being clean and healed.

And by 4, I had put an offer in on a great little house that I will hopefully soon call home. (Say a little prayer that by 5 tomorrow I will have received a call saying "accepted" or "countered" and not "denied"!)

I don't know what has prompted this change in me lately, but the past few days have been blissfully peaceful. Calm and optimistic. Anyone who's been around me the last couple weeks would probably be shocked by that considering the dither HSM Reprise and workshops have had me in. My temper and anxiety have gotten the worst of me more often than not the past few weeks, and now: it ends.

Some part of me is completely ashamed to admit that I hurt every time a parent questions my abilities because of my age or lack of degree. I know I'm competent. I know I'm capable. I know I'm GOOD. Because God put this little alarm inside me that has ruled a great portion of my life. It's called overachievement. (and if you ever need encouragement to get off your butt and take charge of positive productivity, overachievement's got your back!) I embrace my type A personality. I am high strung. I am temperamental. I am opinionated, stubborn, argumentative, anal, anxious, and down right bossy sometimes. But I'm also a dedicated, responsible, hard worker who not only gets jobs done, but gets them done right and on time.

So I shouldn't care what a 40 year old housewife with 3 little brats and no ambition thinks of me (NO-I am not implying that all housewives & mothers have no ambition...but have you met a northside stay at home mom lately?!). But I do. So I've been thinking about going back to school and getting a useful degree for a while. And about the time I looked at Cathy and said, "I have nothing to do...is it really only 3 o'clock?" on Tuesday, I called ULM and made the appointment. When I've planned so far in advance that I have 2 WHOLE HOURS to waste, I need a new project.

Aside from letting beastly rich women get to me, I've also been feeling less than challenged lately, and my mind can't handle that. I've got to be working towards something, overcoming obstacles to really feel like I'm useful and productive. And school does that. When I found out what my first semester of business classes held: accounting and statistics, I was THRILLED. I absolutely cannot wait. I'm sick, I know, and ever so happy!

I've been house hunting for about a month and a half now. I started in a price bracket far beyond my reach and have been pretty unsuccessful at finding something IN my bracket that wasn't in disrepair (or lingering on death...blech) But this little estate sale has a lot of charm, and no house I've seen yet even begins to compare. Yes, it's got old lady decor, but you know-I think I can live with 8 inch rose wallpaper border around the ceiling until I get a paint party going. :)

I've been in a state of patience this week too. What happens, happens. What's meant to be will come. No rush on life. It's fascinating, really. Letting go. What a concept. And look what happens when you don't try to decide what God's will is. WHoa! No way! :p

So...Friday the 13th bodes ill will no more :) Not for this little lady.

Footprints

2008-05-22T00:35:00.003-05:00

So I haven't posted in a very long time, and it's a little bit thrilling to be sitting in front of a computer on my free time and not looking at something in such close detail. It's just a little empty canvas with no designs on time.

It's been amusing to me lately the number of people I've heard from or run into that haven't been a part of my life in so long. And that statement makes me realize that it doesn't matter when a person impacted our lives, they never stop being "a part of our life". Even if we "cut them out" or ignore them or drift apart. We can't deny that at some point or another we'll be reminded of how they left a little piece of their world in ours.

And it's extremely nice when one of those little voices out of the blue reminds you of how you left a little piece of yours in theirs. It's not necessarily a "special" feeling or "important" or "go me". It's this peace, knowing you're not entirely useless outside of your work mode. You're not a social failure. You're not a bad friend. You're not lost to mankind just because you're a workaholic. You're reminded that at some point you took the time to be a person another person could be with. And you start to see that you do it more often than you give yourself credit for. And I think it would be nice to pass that on. To make someone else give themself some much deserved credit.

Thus my blog. Each of you who read this, you're part of my life. Thank you. So take a moment to give yourself some credit. I'm giving you lots. :)

"An artist cannot do anything slovenely..."-Jane Austen

2008-04-07T20:58:00.003-05:00

I quote that from my office, and if any of you have actually seen my office..or my house for that matter, you know what that quote says about me! Laura=No Artist

I've been thinking about self-perceptions vs. the perceptions of others today. But that blog was wordy and boring, and really just thinking about it is interesting enough. So I started over.

I've been dying to read again lately. Books are calling me. I went to Books a Million to get my best friend a birthday card and ended up rifling through the Christian fiction section for almost an hour. I stopped myself from actually buying anything thinking, "Yes Laura, you'll spend $20 today on a book you MIGHT finally open in 3 months." But I'm DYING! I'm hungry for words. Reading them, writing them. I'm also dying to make some music. I miss my guitars and piano. And I have a sneaky suspicion they miss me too. :) Maybe in May.

I did dig into my house today. I took down all the bamboo window shades. It is amazing what ambiance a change in lighting can do for a place. It's mine now. :) I'm going to hit the extra bedroom heavily in my spare time in the next few days. Then move to the living room, and land in the office just in time for my new computer. Then...PAINT! wooT! I'll keep y'all posted on when the painting overhaul is going to happen. You're all welcome to come roll my walls!!!!

HARD WIRED!!!!!

2008-04-06T14:56:00.002-05:00

So we spent a week and a half without desks. And a week and a half without the right phone lines. And two weeks with a box office program that took so long to load we had to go to the box office itself to reserve tickets. And random days without internet access....well, most of the last week.

But no more!

No sir. The new YoungTroupe offices are officially HARD WIRED to the network!!!! And we've got ALL PHONE LINES!!!!! And they ring at the right desks! And I'm blogging from my desk with an land line internet connection!!! wooT! Now if only the printers would print....

Reality Bites Back is going well. The shows this weekend seemed to fly by. Sugar is getting more and more fun for me. And I'm psyched about summer shows and reprises and workshops! My lack of sleep is catching up with me, though. I get a little more tired and a little grouchier daily.

I've caught myself screening phone calls more often too. I always answer my texts. But the phone...it's beginning to scare me. I hit this point of panic when certain names pop up, and I just know they're calling upset because I've done something wrong, and I wait for the little "ding" to hit when I've got the voicemail. I think it's because I'm paranoid lately that I've overlooked something. With everything flying around, I'm bound to have missed something. And God help me if that something is a vital something!

Ah....the joys of the stage...

2008-03-26T09:16:00.006-05:00

I write to you from my office a mere 20 feet or so from the door to the performance space where Sugar is rehearsing...no, not Sugar-she's not in til scene 4 and although we've been here since 6:30 (it's almost 8 now) we're not there yet. By the time we'd been here for an hour and ahalf yesterday, we were through with Act I in its entirety. But oh well. So, I sit.

I can't say I'm wholly unsatisfied with the situation. I've had time to pay all of my bills online. I've read all of that email that daily gets thrown into my "personal" folder while I'm wading through the "important" stuff. I've reorganized my favorites list. I've reorganized my computer desktop. I've made plans to kidnap men from the show to do my bidding and move my desk...nah-wishful thinking. Speaking of moving desks....

Cathy and I are somewhat moved into our new permanent home here at work. YoungTroupe and MainStage UNITE! Yes, folks, after all those years of "the big rift" with slander being slung from youth to adult and back again, we're really putting our noses into unifying this place. It needs it. I must say, even without a desk (we're not doing so well on the MOVING part. Our computers and all our desk acoutrements are here, but not the desks themselves.) I've felt so much better about work being in the new space. Money reports are easier. Phone calls are easier. Faxes are easier. And dare I say a lack of absolute solitude is kind of nice! Granted, it's only been a few days, and this whole family of staff thing may eventually wear me out, but I really don't see it coming. It's silly how much one little parking lot can change. It is amazing to me just how different an environment can make life. I'm loving it. But seriously...desks a necessity...and I'll not miss running halfway through the building to get a printout once the YT printer/copier makes its way over!

Speaking of loving it...I mentioned to the Mikey recently that studies have shown that Spring is a "better time" for those with personality disorders. Much more so than say, winter. And I always kind of scoffed at that. Winter's my favorite season for poo sake! But I'm starting to wonder. Life of late has been superbly beautiful. Even as hectic as things have been, myself and the people around me have been...chipper. And I cannot decide what to attribute it to. Is it this lovely weather with few enough rain showers to lightly sprinkle our little world with poetry? Is it the feeling of accomplishment with little tasks and large being taken care of daily? Is it the satisfaction I've finally settled into, being an adult of 22 years in the career I've dreamed of with a home and a little family of pups and a life and not constantly wanting more, different, better, different? Is it being back on stage after the torturous year away? Is it the comfort of family and friends so much more appreciated now than before? Is it the Mikey love? Is it all of that?

What I think is this: in school we were continuously reminded of that God forsaken "puzzle" that every show represented. It was repeatedly explained that "every piece changes the overall shape." And yes, I understand that concept completely. I don't always get to be Maria or Sugar on stage. But what about in real life? I'm beginning to realize that the same rules apply. Every piece may fit, but it will change the picture you end up with. And for me to be Laura every time, I've got to have precisely the right pieces together. For now, I think I've got them. And I am exceptionally happy with the picture there. I might even glue it and stick it on my wall! When other pieces come along, I'll start a new puzzle. I mean, I've got a lot of wall to cover at home!

OMG! I'M TCW!

2008-03-12T16:07:00.005-05:00

I have of late been in a funk. And I've kept thinking "What do I have to DO?!" Kept whole-heartedly believing that I've done everything I can to swim on out into a different current but I just can't shake off the undertow. So helplessness turns to defiance. "What else are ya gonna throw at me?" I can take it. I can. I mean, He doesn't throw things at you that you can't handle. Right?

Right. Except then I realized. He isn't throwing anything at me. Heck-he hasn't even gently placed anything new on my plate in the last two months or more! He keeps trying to take it away. And I keep ripping it out of His loving hands and squishing it right back down on my heart. What do I have to do? Just stop. Stop waving off the dozens of boats that keep passing by trying to pull me out. Stop helping that seaweed wrap around my flailing legs. Stop holding my breath and get outta the water. Beautiful, warm, bountiful dry land stands about 60 yards away, and I'd rather doggy paddle my way around the sharks than just get my arms moving and my lungs breathing. Every time I start, I decide I need background music, and that drama induced nostalgia starts pumping through me with the power cords. Emo Laura makes a less than triumphant return and not even total and utter defeat can make her EJECT. My cape and tights thrive on that melodramatic poetic submersion. But my life does not.

I spent a good part of the drive back last night trying to level out the concept of "honesty' in my head. And it boiled down to: if you can't be honest with yourself, who else should trust you? And trust, as many of you know, is one HUGE bit of importance to me.

So here. If admitting it is the first step, I'm standing trial for me. I plead guilty to holding onto all that is completely unrealistic, fighting for what no longer exists (and may never have), and rejecting the real happiness He just won't give up on trying to bless me with. I have no idea what step 2 is, but I have a feeling it sounds something like "Replace discs 1-3 for good." So-hey! Why not now?

Um...ew.

2008-03-07T19:54:00.003-06:00

I'm refusing to hop on the "I'm busy and in love" bandwagon. We're going to go with a little reflection.

March marks two big milestones for the Laura Michelle. The largest of the two: it was one year ago this week that I was hired for my dream job. Yes, office manager for a youth theatre program in quite possibly one of the 10 smallest, most backward thinking cities in the south. It makes me realize something. We dream our entire lives. Huge shining fairytale futures that we never fully expect to come true. We have our core goals and all the little frills we want upon them. And I think at some point, we all give up a little hope on ever having what we truly want. We get this feeling that we're just going to have to buck up and settle for the generic. And I, being your classic type A personality, the over achiever-own worst critic-perfectionist-who's never satisfied with what they have or where or who they are-that is sure their time is running out and they have to do everything they've planned in their life before they turn 25....I finally got over that and got happy-with what I do and where and who I am and then I realized: this IS what I planned for my life-and I'm only 22! You never know what package your dreams are going to show up in. Mine came in an Administrative Assistant's position at a theatre I'd been to once (for extra credit of course) whose youth program I didn't even know existed in the middle of Monroe, Lousyana....I am so incredibly happy.

March also marks one year since Hello, Dolly! It's been a full year since I've been on stage. And I'm DYING. Now don't misunderstand. I absolutely LOVE the work I do off stage. I love helping box office and ushering, and I cannot describe to you what directing does to me. It is one of the most fulfilling aspect of my life. I am completely overwhelmed by my kids' talent and dedication and enthusiasm and passion. They fill me up with immeasurable happiness. And you cannot, of course, explain that to a 15 or 16 year old. "You make my dreams come true" just comes off creepy. And maybe one day they'll know and understand. For now, it's enough for me to feel it. But acting breeds an adrenaline all its own. I go to a place on stage that I just can't get to from anywhere else. It's as if my passport to self-fulfillment is printed in some funny little ink that can only be seen by the stage lights. I am the most raw form of me up there. And now I'm back. In a double whammy. Reality Bites Back and Sugar: Some Like It Hot. And there's nothing that will keep me away for this long ever again.

Alright, I'm off to the Strauss kitchen to see the Mikey in between scenes. I refuse to get more mushy here than I'd be in person, so suffice it to say, I'm smiling. Big. I like no definition. I need no definition. I'm happy. Define that.

Meanwhile back at the hotel....

2008-02-29T20:15:00.003-06:00

I'm actually NOT working right now. It's 8:30 on a Friday night and I'm not working.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! I'M NOT WORKING!!!!!!

I'm volunteering at MainStage :b No that's not pathetic, that's true love. I love the stage and the stage loves me. And I love Cathy and she loves me....MORE! (Yeah, I'm talkin to you) Speaking of you...

I have not given in. But some of you may have noticed that I was kind enough to accept suggestions on my little caravan. Mr. Steele, you'll notice you have three vehicular aparatus..aparati? And the rest of you lucky people have three ways to find him. Yay. :b Love ya :)

Walmart break before intermission for FOOOOOOOD! wooT! The Laura Mobile shall return...I mean, c'mon...it's a LOOOOOOONG show.

You people suck.

2008-02-28T08:22:00.000-06:00

It's not enough that there's myspace and facebook. No. Nowadays if i wanna have ANY idea what the people i actually live near enough to TALK to and SEE on a regular basis are doing, thinking, and feeling, i have to check Blogger. When you think about it, it's all just more of that social efficiency. How few words can i say and still inform everyone i've ever known what the goings on in my life are? Well i'll tell ya, havin' to do it in THREE places isn't so very efficient peeps!

:)

So i actually created one of these little buggers, that is, a blogger account, somewhere around 2 or 3 years ago, and can't actually remember my login or password. i distinctly remember re-saving my profile a thousand and twelve times to get a "random question" that i liked, or could be creative enough on to please myself. A) There were fewer choices back then before they started repeating themselves. Kind of like TacoBell sauce packets. And B) They were better back then. FYI: My current profile question i only re-saved for about 3 times, and it, for some reason makes "thumb pinky" pop into my head which is actually why i kept it. It's nice to know i'll never grow out of certain aspects of my character.

In any case, i had to start a new one. But i'm sincerely curious as to what i had put in my old one and will continue to "look" for it. i'll keep you posted cause i know you're all just chomping at the bit for my freshman thoughts :p

For now...this little princess has some serious work to get done.